Talk:Darren Finizio

Act's Experience
"Hello, my name is Darren. I am a musician, highly prized amongst esoterics for the past 30 years. According to TV and the Internet I was performing on AMT as a 'comedian'. Pretty insidious.....but, then, anybody whose been on the show wouldn't be surprised. In retrospect, I was probably a fool for entertaining the notion that someone like me should be able to connect to a collective rabble which regards pitch-friendly fashion models singing codependency ballads as 'talent'. Anyway, I thought it might be interesting to tell you'll that I was up on that stage for about 20 minutes. I wasn't familiar with the show and wanted to keep it a surprise so I could have a magical day, showcasing my unique musical talents. When I walked out on the stage I realized I was in an opera house with a gigantic chandelier on the ceiling. I couldn't stop looking at it. People roared with laughter.....it was was the like loud thunder. Howie Mandel kept prodding me about what I do for a living. I told him I was an artist and he laughed at me. I tried to play a song ("Suntrails"), and after the first chord/word, felt loud beeping sounds and boos's ripping through my upper chest. They didn't sound check my guitar, so I threw it on the stage in disgust. I watched it tumble around then threw myself on the ground and tumbled too.....for about three minutes: up and down and all around. It was crazy, but it got their attention. Cheers began to mix in with the boo's. I stood up, dusted myself off and confronted the four celebrity judges. Sharon Osbourne seemed to be saying "I Love You" repeatedly through her lips: but she may have been telling me to leave. I didn't. I began shrieking at the crowd, "you all bark like dogs, huh.....I can too: rrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuf, rrrrrrrrrrrruuuuuf!". I did this while crawling on all fours. They began cheering, many chanting my name. It was weird. I began screaming stuff about how lame the show was and how the people should know better than to berate a barbershop quartet from San Diego (who were actually quite good). They cheered some more. I told the judge they were never-were's and the crowd cheered some more. I was delighting in this performance. It wasn't a musical display.....it was something different and, most of all, it was LOUD. Not loud coming from guitar amplifiers, but loud coming from an acoustic assembly of people old and young. Looking back, it was the most eventful performance I've ever given. A performance not given in front of a group of art students or aging hipsters who judge you on your ability to sound like The Velvet Underground. This was America At Large. Super Large. Special thanks should go out to the beautiful opera girl singer's father who told me it was the best performance he ever saw and the Italian ballet dancer who was equally as moved. When I walked outside I was flooded by people who wanted my autograph.....bodies, books, programs, you name it. Driving home I walked to the train station fancying that I might become well known famous, due to my dubiously wonderful performance. Would they show it on TV? When it aired it was just ten seconds of me rolling around on the floor. Nothing special. But, hey, that's show biz. Wouldn't we all like to see Brock Lesnar versus Alexander Rusev? Not going to happen. It's just not what Americans want to see. Or is it? " - Darren