Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-26983547-20180913194343/@comment-32239636-20190627164026

Freshlysqueezed7 wrote: MikeyIsBae wrote: THE JOKENING: Episode 4

After a short break, I am back to continue the worlds greatest fan fiction!

The first act of the night was ADEM crew. ADEM crew was already controversial since several boos could be heard when Terry pronounced their name as ADAM. Many people thought that this was a nod to Adam Levines departure of the voice, and Shane Dawson walked onstage and began to film a video about this conspiracy theory. Sophie Pecora was also featured in this video since she is his daughter. While Shane and Sophie were filming, ADEM began to perform, but a strange figure could be seen in the corner of the stage. "Is that Riana Riani?", questioned Simon. "NO! Thats Adaline Bates!", said Howie. For some random ass reason, Adaline Bates was performing by herself and the whole audience was confused if she was ADEM Crew or if ADEM Crew was Adem Crew. Chris Burr thought that this act was spellbounding and it has the potential to win ALL got talent shows! It will win at least, and win at most!

Auditions 4 continued with Young country gal Ansley Burns strutting onstage more confident than she ever had been before. When Ansley began to sing Aretha, Simon stopped her because he got some "spidey senses" that Ansley was trying to summon queen Aretha from the grave. Julianne also added that little white girls should not be singing fat black lady songs. Ansley was hurt by this and she did not know what to do so she just stood onstage striking random poses every once and a while. Simon would ask her if she would like a bottle of water and a flashback occured on the background screen of Evie Clairs audition where he asked her the same question. Ansley did not respond and she began to make a Tik Tok. It got on the for you page but the comments were very rude so they could not be shown on TV. Chris Burr predicts that she will loose the semifinals dunkin save due to the fact that her spot in the finale will be taken over by Marina Mazepa and Yuriyan Retriver, who will change genders since no females will be in the finale!

The third act of the night was the Detroit Youth Choir. The members of this choir Include Flau'Jae (Hood Spice), Johnny Manuel (Soul Spice), Joseph Allen (Rap Spice), Linkin Bridge (Fat Spice), Quintavious (Nerdy Spice), Mike Yung (Poor Spice), and Brandon Rogers (Ur Mom Dead Spice). The act sang the song "Hero" by Mariah Carey, which was dedicated to Sarah Grandpe, the director of Voices of Hope and former member of their choir as (Yass Queen Geyyy Spice). Not a dry eye was left in the audience as Mike Yung collapsed from starving and Flau'Jae brought her dead dads corpse on stage. Chris Burr claims this was the greatest audition in history, but they will be cut at the open call auditions since NO group acts OR female acts will make the finale in Season 14!

The fourth performance of the night came from SOS. Since his name sounds like Dr. Seuss, he dressed up as The Cat and the Hat. Gabrielle felt threatened and left the theater since she thought he was a furry. To make sure nobody stole her judging seat, Gabrielle brought her daughter Kaavia to "keep it warm" while she sat in the "Dunkin Lounge" during this performance. Unconvinently, she was still being breast fed so Gabrielle struggled transferring her from her nipple to the seat. When Simon asked SOS what his talent was, he had to correct him because he used the wrong pronouns. SOS likes to abide by "they/them" or "who/whom" as his pronouns, but Simon refused to do this. SOS was then taken offstage by his parents who cursed at the judges for not rigging the competition for them, even though they got the pimp spot of their quarterfinal in Season 11. Chris Burr predicts that SOS will get eliminated in the Top 10 Bottom 5 because he is one of the best talents in one of the hardest seasons ever! He claims that Season 14 may be the very first season to have many co-champions!

The final performance of the night was Marcin. Everytime Marcin strummed his guitar it made a villager noise from minecraft. The weaboos in the audience kept going "UwU" everytime this happened and Howie Mandel said he "sister stanned" the sound of the weaboos. The "Standels" and the weaboos then rushed onstage to give Howie a hug but unfortunately he fainted due to the overwhelming amount of pathogens. Chris Burr predicts Marcin will tie as 9th in Judge Cuts with Caly Bevier in one of the most controversial seasons! No act will go unnoticed! Season 15 will feature no females!

Julianne will be replaced with Derek Hough!

Gabrielle will be replaced by Dwayne Wade!

Nick Cannon will co-host alongside Terry Crews!

Death will re-enter the compeition as an audition wildcard!

The guest judges will be Eric Cowell, James Charles, Preacher Lawson, and Etika!

James Charles will get fired by Simon for being too "feminine" like!

Shane Dawson will replace James Charles!

Eric Cowell will give the golden buzzer to Michael Paul because Simon claimed it was Eric's "favorite act of the night"!

Shane will fall on the golden buzzer for Sophie!

Preacher will hit the golden buzzer for Jackie Fabulous because he loves him some black booty!

Etika will press the golden buzzer for Death because........well.........yah!

Quarterfinal 1 will include Eric, V.Unbeatable, Verba, Detroit Choir, Tyler, and ADEM because QF 1 is always stacked as f***!

Quarterfinal 2 will be worse than ever!

Nick Wallace will haunt the show!

Michael's bird will become possessed and eat all of the judges!

Ryan's hands will come back!

Light Balance Kids will dance naked!

Sophie's guitar strings will break!

And Human Fuse will catch the Dolby Theatre on fire!

Quarterfinal 3 will not happen because the theatre will catch on fire!

Fans will complain that Kodi never got to preform because he was "autistic"!

And that will be the end of AGT forever!

Chris Burr's Got Talent will replace it! RIP Etika